I had to talk myself into going to the writers’ workshop at Shakespeare and Company last Sunday at least a dozen times. Which is ironic, since my original plan for my time in Paris was something of a writer’s retreat.
I had done quite a lot of research into the English-language literary scene in Paris. There are a handful of writers’ workshops in the city, and I had intended to attend several of them. But plans change, and the trip became much more activity-based, and other than blogging, I didn’t write anything while in Paris at all.
It was only in writing about Shakespeare and Company for this blog that I remembered the writers’ workshops – the bookstore plays host to at least two of them. And when I dug a little deeper to find the details again, I realized there would be one on the Sunday evening that I was in town.
Saturday evening, I went back and forth on the idea several times. I had a science fiction short story I wanted to workshop, but what if it wasn’t literary enough? What if someone stole my ideas – I didn’t know the people involved, and I was supposed to bring copies for them.What if I didn’t get the copies back? (… yes, I know. I didn’t say this was rational.) What if the people were mean?
I decided I would prepare my piece and decide at the last minute if I wanted to go or not. I saved my story to a memory stick and looked up the address of a local photocopy shop where I could get it printed out.
Sunday was a perfect Parisian day. I slept in a little, then spent the early afternoon wandering around the Ile St-Louis, which is the oldest part of town and an area I hadn’t ever explored before. It’s a beautiful neighbourhood of narrow streets and boutique shops and very, very expensive apartments. There is no metro and very little in the way of street traffic.
The sun came out and the weather was mild, and I whiled away an hour or two sitting on a bench by the banks of the Seine reading my book. This was exactly what I wanted from my Paris vacation.
Later in the afternoon, I met up with a friend for tea. We worked together over the summer in Canada, and she is now directing a play in Paris. It was wonderful to see a friendly face after spending several days on my own. She took me to a cozy cafe in the Marais district and we sipped tea and chatted for two hours.
If we’re still chatting, I won’t cut it off to go and do the workshop, I thought. I’d rather spend time with my friend. But at 5:30 she had to head off anyway, and I had plenty of time to make it to the book shop.
I had already failed at getting my story printed out. I found the printing shop earlier in the day with no problem, but I hadn’t thought about the fact that it was Sunday, and the shop was closed. I spent the hour before the workshop wandering through the university neighbourhood on the Left Bank, trying and failing to find somewhere else to print my story.
If I don’t have copies of my story, there’s no point in going to the workshop, I thought. What if it’s weird that I’m there with no story? What if I’m the only one?
What if the other stories are bad?
What if I have nothing to say?
What if the people are weird and pretentious?
Finally I decided that if I was trying this hard to find a way out of going to the workshop, the workshop was probably something I needed to do. As the saying goes: find what scares you and do it.
Even so, I nearly walked out while I was waiting for it to start. I had to promise myself that if I really didn’t like it, I was allowed to leave after it started.
The workshop was, of course, just fine. There was one person I wanted to jab with a fork and one person who got super-defensive about his work, but that’s about par for the course in terms of workshops. None of the works we read were terrible. And about 2/3 of the other attendees were there with no piece to workshop.
The structure of the workshop was a little different. I was used to reading the piece, and then going around the room twice – the first time everyone says what they think the piece did well, and then everyone offers constructive criticism. It was a classroom environment and designed to keep things positive.
In the Paris workshop, the leader asked us to talk about what we felt while reading the piece, and I found the resulting comments were often on the harsh side. Not unduly so, there were no attacks, nothing aggressive, but no one was pulling any punches either. I did like that there was no one-by-one-going-around-the-room-style commenting, though. It was more of a conversation, which gave me a chance to listen to others before I offered my comments. And I didn’t have to comment at all if I didn’t want to.
The pieces were pretty evenly split between poetry and prose. Workshopping poetry was a new experience for me. I don’t know anything about poetry and was worried I wouldn’t understand or wouldn’t have anything to say. But it was amazing the way that the imagery in these poems kept unfolding as we discussed them. I was pleased to find that I did have opinions on them, even if I didn’t necessarily speak them.
It wasn’t a life-changing event, and I can’t say that I really learned anything, but I’m pleased I went. It was something I wanted to do while I was in Paris, and I didn’t let myself chicken out. And it really wasn’t so scary in the end.